When I was making this piece, I was switching from one medication to another. It was — and still is — an unpleasant few days full of uncertainty, random panic attacks and ill-advised Googling. It irritates me when people call antidepressants “happy pills” or infer that taking medication makes you weak, because starting on psychiatric medication is terrifying and full of unknowns. Instead, starting on medication is actually brave. It feels like playing an extremely unpredictable game with your own brain — and the prize isn’t unnatural happiness but simply a feeling of normalcy.